Dear Abby: Should I drop my serial home wrecking friend?

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DEAR ABBY: I've a longtime pal, “Laurie,” who's single. Many of the relationships she will get into are with males who're in relationships already. She typically means that my husband and I and he or she get collectively to hang around, however I discourage it as a result of I don’t belief her utterly. (I do belief my husband.)

Laurie and I've been there for one another throughout tough instances, however I battle quite a bit with the truth that she has relationships with married males or males who're in different dedicated relationships. I've been tempted to inform the companions of those males, however I keep in my lane and thoughts my very own enterprise. It eats away at me generally, and I really feel like I would like to finish the friendship. Then I really feel like mates ought to be there by way of thick and skinny. Are you able to give me some steerage? — UNEASY IN THE EAST

DEAR UNEASY: Your pal Laurie has boundary issues in the case of males, which she has proven you repeatedly. As a result of you aren't comfy with the concept of you, your husband and Laurie socializing collectively, hearken to your instinct and chorus from arranging it. Since you disapprove of her way of life to the extent that you're considering of ending the connection you've gotten together with her, inform her how you're feeling. She wants to listen to it.

DEAR ABBY: Yearly like clockwork, we obtain a vacation card from mates, which the spouse addresses solely to my husband. It's at all times a jolly card full of their household adventures and achievements for the 12 months, and it invariably leaves me questioning why she thinks it’s OK to go away me off the envelope. My husband and I've been collectively for greater than 20 years. She is aware of I exist. We have now met. I went to her marriage ceremony. Our husbands are pricey mates.

Final 12 months, my husband lastly talked about to his pal how a lot it hurts my emotions to be left off the cardboard. He appeared stunned his spouse did that, however stated he’d repair it earlier than the following playing cards went out. I used to be excited on the considered her altering her impolite methods when their subsequent card arrived. However, like yearly earlier than, I used to be unnoticed once more.

This actually bothers me. I've felt unnoticed sufficient instances in my life, and it stings on the core. I really feel like she is a grown-up imply woman, and I can’t determine why she would deliberately not embody me. A part of me needs to ship a card to everybody in her household and go away her identify off. What do you suppose? — LEFT OFF IN WYOMING

DEAR LEFT OFF: I believe that, as a result of anticipating your husband to intercede for you didn’t work, it’s time to choose up the telephone. Inform this clueless lady your first (and final) identify and ask her why she appears unable to deal with her greeting playing cards in order that they embody you in addition to your partner. If, after that, she continues to “neglect,” you'll know past a doubt that she’s not solely clueless however classless, and keep away from no matter publicity you could have together with her as typically as doable.

Pricey Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, often known as Jeanne Phillips, and was based by her mom, Pauline Phillips. Contact Pricey Abby at http://www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Field 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.